Review: Time Lord Victorious: The Knight, The Fool and The Dead [Science Fiction]

 

Rating: 5/5 stars

The Waters of Mars is my all time favourite Doctor Who episode, partly because of the overall plot, but especially because of these two quotes by the Doctor:

"There are laws of time. Once upon a time there were people in charge of those laws but they died. They all died. Do you know who that leaves? Me! It's taken me all these years to realize that the laws of time are mine and they will obey me!"

and

"For a long time now, I thought I was just a survivor, but I'm not. I'm the winner. That's who I am. The Time Lord victorious."

I've been obsessed with those three words ever since. Time Lord Victorious. There's something so dark, so Master-esque about them, and you bet your arse I've written countless fanfiction where the words Time Lord Victorious features promiently. I've been super annoyed that the words Time Lord Victorious never appeared again in canon since that episode, because god - imagine all that potential!

So when this book was announced - a whole multi-media series based off the concept of the Time Lord Victorious, something that I'd believed was a throwaway line from an episode ten years ago - the concept of this vainglorious Doctor who has the best possible goals and goes about them in the worst possible ways; a white knight with a god complex? Not to mention that this is the Tenth Doctor?

I thought I'd dreamt it.

Seriously. My brain's pretty fucked at the best of times; this wouldn't be the first time. So I Googled it, one hundred percent certain that I must have dreamt this because there is no way that my obsession that I've been hankering after for AN ENTIRE DECADE has actually happened. No way.

Well, way.

Of course, that meant that The Knight, the Fool and the Dead had a lot to live up to. Could it ever reach my expectations, which are somewhere in the vicinity of the stratosphere? Would the Doctor be insane enough, would he be arrogant enough, or would be just be a bit wishy-washy like all the Doctor Who content over the past couple of years? (Jodie, I love you, but Chibnall can't fucking write your character.)

Yes, is the answer. This is the Doctor at his worst from a personality point of view, and therefore the best from a narrative point of view. He goes back to the Dark Times, when Gallifrey was just a speck in the universe's eye, which is ambitious enough as it is.

And then he tries to eliminate Death. From the universe. Forever.

So yes, the Doctor was narcissistic enough for my hungry dark tastes. And against all odds, this definitely lived up to my expectations.

My Favourite Books of 2020

You don’t need me to tell you that this has been a year of unprecedented horribleness, especially for me for all sorts of non-COVID personal reasons. But one thing that wasn’t a giant pile of flaming garbage about 2020 was reading, so here’s a wrap up of my absolute favourite books I’ve read in 2020.

Final Lover – Jocelynn Drake

Final Lover is the third and final book in the Exit Strategy trilogy by Jocelynn Drake. I can’t really say anything at all about the plot, because it will spoil the first two books, but it was a perfect finale. The first book in the series is titled Deadly Lover, and it’s an M/M romance/thriller featuring two assassins used to working alone who have to join forces for a job. Dark and delicious!

Deviant Desire – Jackson Marsh 

An incredibly fun historical mystery with an M/M romance. Long and layered, with fantastic character development, this certainly exceeded my expectations. Strangely enough, however, I simply couldn’t get into the sequel and had to DNF it. Them’s the breaks, kid!

Pendulum – Joel Abernathy 

Another M/M romance – is anyone else detecting a theme here? This time, it’s a paranormal featuring werewolves and vampires, yet somehow Abernathy manages to breathe new life into this trope we have seen a thousand times before. Angsty and dark, this is certainly not a light read, but it’s very worthwhile.

Hush – Tal Bauer 

An incredibly engaging political thriller with, you guessed it, an M/M romance. A masterpiece in character development and suspense, Hush broke my heart and then put it back together again, and it will stay with me for a very long time. I’m definitely going to be looking through the rest of Bauer’s bibliography.

The War Master: Only the Good – Nicholas Briggs et al. 

A Doctor Who spinoff from audioplay masters (no pun intended) Big Finish. The Master is one of my favourite characters in the whole of the Whoniverse, and this collection of four stories certainly did him justice. Derek Jacobi is also an absolutely superlative actor, both on screen and in audio.

Of the City of the Saved... – Philip Purser-Hallard 

The next novel in the Faction Paradox series after the absolutely phenomenal This Town Will Never Let Us Go. Although by a different author and with a completely different style, Of the City of the Saved has the same postmodern, almost psychedelic feel of the first book, with possibly the most intriguing concept I have ever heard: in the City of the Saved, where every single human who has ever lived and will ever live resides in an immortal afterlife, a detective must solve an impossible murder.

The Fever King – Victoria Lee 

This was the YA novel that restored my faith in YA. I don’t read much of it nowadays – ever since I fell outside the intended age range I’ve never been able to get into them as I used to, even though I’m only a couple of years older – but The Fever King was one of my favourite books of 2020, YA or otherwise. It’s set in a post-apocalyptic America that has been decimated by a virus (because I had to read at least one virusy book in 2020) that either kills painfully, or in a very small number of cases, gives you magic. It’s very gritty, and doesn’t fall into the same tired old tropes that lots of YA dystopians do.

Doctor Who: Embrace the Darkness – Nicholas Briggs 

Another Big Finish audio, this time featuring the Eighth Doctor. This is the sort of unsettling, gorgeous gothic sci-fi that only Doctor Who can do, and when it does it right, it does it really well. Although not as popular as Chimes of Midnight, which was released close to Embrace the Darkness and has a similar gothic feel, I enjoyed it far more. Certainly one of the more underrated entries in Big Finish’s Main Range of DW audios.

Featherhood – Charlie Gilmour 

I won’t go into too much detail about this wonderful memoir, as I’ve already written a blog post on it, but this is certainly a must-read.

Violet Bent Backwards Over the Grass – Lana del Rey

I’ve always admired Lana del Rey as a lyricist as well as a singer, so of course I’ve been eagerly anticipating the release of her first poetry book. At a time where overly-minimalist, shallow and surface-level poets such as Rupi Kaur and Amanda Lovelace seem to be the most popular (sorry if you’re a fan, but they’re emphatically not for me) it’s fantastic to see a poet with more complexity and, yes, thought put into her poems. The hardcover is also beautifully presented, the font in a typewriter face and interspersed with del Rey’s photography that’s just as whimsical and quietly melancholy as her poetry.

The Way of Kings – Brandon Sanderson 

I DNF’d this when I first tried to read it in 2015, but since I am a huge Branderson (I’m never going to stop calling him this, so get used to it) fan, I’ve left it quietly waiting on my shelves for the right time – and 2020 was the right time. I honestly have no idea why I DNF’d it, although I was sixteen and I had all sorts of impaired judgement going on at that time. The Way of Kings has the sort of multi-layered narrative, wonderful characters, and one-of-a-kind worldbuilding one expects from Branderson, but as this is the first book in a projected ten-book series, the magic system unfolds far more slowly than in his previous books, leaving shadowy areas of intriguing mystique.

Review: This Is How You Lose the Time War [Science Fiction]

 

Rating: 5/5 stars

“This feels like teetering on the brink of something that will unmake me.”

Utterly impossibly, this book managed to exceed my expectations. Do not take me lightly when I say I expected this book to be a masterpiece - and it was more.

Literary genre fiction is something so rare it’s sometimes considered impossible. This Is How You Lose the Time War laughs in the face of critics who disparage science-fiction, and it is not literary and poetic in spite of being science-fiction, it simply is.

I feel like this book has turned me inside out, leaving my nervous system exposed like wires, raw and aching. I am going to carry this book with me for a very long time, like these characters carry their letters.

Review: Featherhood by Charlie Gilmour [Memoir, Non-Fiction]

 Rating: 5/5 stars

Since the year is nearly at a close, I feel safe in saying that Featherhood is unquestionably the best memoir of 2020.

I have been following Benzene's story on here since the beginning, so of course I got my greedy little goblin hands on this as fast as I could.

Eyebrows are often raised amongst the cynical and the merely pragmatic whenever someone with famous connections – in this case the son of Pink Floyd guitarist David Gilmour – lands a book deal, but in this case within the first few pages it becomes clear that Gilmour is a superb writer, and that this book was published on its own merit rather than because of friends in high places. It is ostensibly a memoir about the bond between Gilmour and the magpie he and his partner rescued from near-death as a fledging, but it's also about so much more than that. Gilmour dives deep into the very heart of his past, relationships, and his soul.

Featherhood is about overcoming despair, learning from past mistakes, and creating a new life. As a celebration of the magpie, it is a must read for those indifferent to magpies or those who hate them – because it will certainly change your mind. It is impossible to read this book and not come out as a magpie-lover, as Gilmour extols the virtues, vices and sheer sparkling intelligence of these wonderful birds. By turns humorous and heartfelt, tragic and triumphant, if you are looking for a book that will bring a new, multi-faceted perspective to your life, Featherhood is it. By turns humorous and heartfelt, it is a reminder in these troubled times that there is always room for kindness, both to our human and animal neighbours.

I absolutely cannot wait to see what Charlie Gilmour comes out with next!

Review: This Town Will Never Let Us Go [Science Fiction]

 

Rating: 5/5 stars.

“This superstition, that anything you do makes any kind of sense on the grand scale, is only right and proper. It’s the ridiculous, impossible, great and unarguable superstition which makes the whole of humanity possible.”

Listen. 

I am offended – an offence which cuts not only to the bone, but to my very marrow – that this has so few ratings, that this is so obscure. I understand why. An indie publisher; a spin-off known only to the most hardcore of fans.

Faction Paradox reaches, with its bare hands, into the dark cosmic horror underbelly of Doctor Who and pulls it, glistening like obsidian, to the surface. Almost literally. 

For this is a Doctor Who spin-off, except you don’t need to know anything about Doctor Who at all. I am not joking; they are ALL standalone characters, ALL standalone plots. You will find no Doctor here. Even if you don’t like Doctor Who, or tried to get into it and failed, if you like science fiction then I implore you to read this. not only is there no crossover of basically anything except from the general universe, it doesn’t feel like Doctor Who. It’s something utterly different. It is Doctor Who’s estranged cousin, the one who none of your family ever talk to, and you aren’t sure what they do for a living but something about them screams mortician, taxidermist, and/or mad scientist. 

For some reason, it reminds me of a cross between Welcome to Night Vale and Black Mirror. It is at turns poignant, trippy, what can only be described as batshit insane, and humorous:

“Valentine doesn’t think clothes are particularly relevant, and it shows. Just look. They’re as uninterested in him as he is in them.” 

“Now she’ll never get hold of a decent fried malmotti wrap ever again, and if there’s one thing guaranteed to make people turn against the War, it’s that kind of inconvenience.” 

But most of all, it’s somehow very Joycean. This is James Joyce doing hard sci-fi, and it is utterly glorious.

Even the format itself is Joycean: it’s a book written in chapterlets probably only 500 words each, a format that I adore anyway, but these are not just any chapterlets: each one represents a minute. We begin at midnight, like all good things do, and go through until six. It’s an extremely clever format, and I’m in love with it. 
So, by now, you’re probably wondering – well, what the hell is this all about? Well, there are three main characters: 

– Inangela, a teenage goth who spends most of the book zooming around the town in her Hell Truck with her friend named Horror. She is desperate to become part of Faction Paradox, even if she pretends it isn’t, and even if nobody is entirely sure if this cult/criminal syndicate/subculture is even real.

– paramedic Valentine, who has unacceptable opinions about the War. what is the War? Nobody really knows. Nobody wants to know, because they could never begin to comprehend something on such a celestial, vast scale. This is a War between what can only be gods. 

– pop star Tiffany, antic and strange, with a public image even more so. I would be surprised if her storyline wasn’t based on a crazy sci-fi version of Richard Dawkins’ memes, a word that has been more than a little bit ruined for me due to its internet connotations, but never mind. 

This is my first Lawrence Miles book, which is almost a sin for someone who claims to be such a big fan of Doctor Who and its extended universe. I don’t know if all his books are like this or this is just his faction paradox style, but holy hell. It is incredible. I had a really hard time whittling the number of quotes down, because I just wanted to put in practically everything. Extremely witty and profound, Miles’ narrative sucks you straight into the story and makes you experience an insane acid trip that will never let you go. 

I actually started to write this review when I was less than a third into the book. This is astonishing because I never draft reviews or write them before I’ve finished reading; they are usually just stream-of-consciousnesses thrown into the void of Goodreads. But I had so many thoughts bouncing around that I was terrified of losing any. 

I hope I have managed to stir your interest. If not, take a gander at the blurb. If that doesn’t interest you, then I don’t know what will. 

This is not light. This is heavy and deep, and if you’re not really into science fiction I don’t think I’d recommend it. It does not just tie your brain into knots, it knits a jumper from it. (I apologise for that visual image.) It is slow, yet also captivating in a way that never fails. It took me a while to read this; although I can sometimes read excellent books very quickly, this one is certainly like a bottle of scotch, or a very strong cheese: it’s gorgeous and wonderful and you must take your time – partially so it ends slower and you can savour it, and partially because, despite it being incredible, it can get a little much in large doses. 

This Town Will Never Let Us Go is empirical proof that genre fiction, specifically science fiction in this case, is not inherently inferior to literary fiction. On the contrary, it can be deeper and more intelligent. Sci-fi can say something profound about modern society in a way that, perhaps it can be argued, literary fiction never can. not in this world, this tech-drenched, augmented-reality world.